How Long Would You Survive in a Horror Film?

Got this test from my pal Dana...

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The Horror Aficionado

54% chance of survival!

Sometimes known as "the wise guy" or "the totally platonic best friend". This character is usually either the most likeable or most excruciatingly annoying character in the movie, because he's almost always the comic relief (or lack thereof). Sometimes he is the first to die because he figures out what's going on, tries to escape and is killed. However, the horror aficionado will more likely use his knowledge to devise the plan that eliminates the threat. That means he survives until the end where he ends up dying as a sacrifice so that the heroine can carry out the plan. Though he tends to lack a backbone, you do feel somewhat bad when he dies.

As long as people feel somewhat bad when I die.

FEAR ME!!!!

Why not? Everybody else does.

I don’t get it and I’m getting somewhat concerned about it. I seem to intimidate the shit out of people. The weird thing is I don’t try to and don’t understand what it is about me that people find so intimidating.

• I don’t shout at people.
• I don’t throw things.
• I get mad at circumstances not individuals (generally).

I think it’s kind of a funny intimidation because my coworkers (often) make jokes about it but it seems like they also really don’t want to anger me.

So what is it? This is an honest inquiry.

What sparked this entry was someone who came over from our manufacturing plant and I asked if he had a check they had received yesterday. He said that [the guy who received it] generally freaks out with checks and wants to get them over here as quickly as possible so I don’t get mad.

I’ve never ever yelled at this person. I’ve been nothing but pleasant to him so how did he pick up on the idea that I’m so fucking scary?

If anyone who knows me has any idea, please let me know.