Abyss of Silence

Monday, October 30, 2006

I hate pink

Rick and I were playing cards yesterday and watching the "House" marathon on TBS.

An advertisement came on for this Playschool or Mattel or whatever it was for a toy "Tool Bench". It had all sorts of oversized and incredibly bright colored plastic tools like a drill and a hammer. I thought it was pretty cool but was utterly annoyed that they only showed little boys playing with it.

I truly believe that we limit kids from their very first day when the new born child is adorned with either a pink or blue cap and blanket.

Maybe I feel this way because I was a tomboy. Although it pisses me off that such a term even exists. I didn't like playing with dolls much. I was good at and enjoyed playing sports. I adored my black and silver big wheel. It didn't make me any less female. I still have a vagina after all. And guess what? I'm not a lesbian.

I'm sickened when you ask a little girl what she wants to be when she grows up and her answer is "A PRINCESS!!" That's horrible. It's horrible because it's programming. We need to stop reading stories to little girls where a woman's only value is her kindness and beauty and her inevitable need to be rescued by a man.

We aren't useless creatures and yet we are raised as such and continue the tradition.

I have friends with children. One of them will only dress her little girls in pink. "I'm raising my girls to be girls!" was her pert answer when I wrinkled my nose at the hue. Though tempted, I didn't answer this back. Though I was tempted to buy her girls something from this site.

Perpetrated by one female upon another. I really wish this crap would stop.


  • I feel ya. And EVEN though I might get frequent "little man" or "he's so cute" comments, I still keep putting my little girl in burnt orange, blue or brown. I admit to feeling a little sting when I hear the boy comments just because I think Toodlepeep's inner feminine beauty shines. That said, we don't live in a pink world. And if we choose to construct one for ourselves, we should probably be old enough to make the decision on our own!

    By Blogger Liv, at 10:06 PM  

  • No we do not live in a pink world. But wouldn't you agree that ideas we are taught as children have a tendency to stick with us? The decision isn't entirely our own. How different would some girls lives had been had they been encouraged in "less girly" endeavors?

    And I dig the fact that you dress your little girl in other colors, by the way.

    It just irks me that a little girl wasn't playing with that tool bench and the fact that one of my friends had it pounded into her head that pink makes you a girl. Granted it is her decision, hence my not answering her back. She can raise her little girls to be princesses if she so chooses. I can only hope they rebel and go goth or something. =)

    By Blogger Abyss of Silence, at 9:08 AM  

  • I like pink because I look good in it (and you know I'm vain), but I totally agree that it shouldn't be shoved on us from birth as a way to define gender.

    Kids usually find their own way to rebel, but it'd be nice if they had a choice from the get go...same with religion!

    By Blogger Dana Fredsti, at 4:17 PM  

  • I was a "tom-boy" too and hated that term. I didn't feel "less of a girl" for being up in the tree, chasing after dogs, making mud pies, etc. etc. I felt FREE!! I always figured I would understand my daughter if she turned out like me, but she never materialized. I never had a girl. Now I'm hoping a little girl grandchild is in my future. That would be lovely and I'd introduce her to mud pies, trees and all things tom-boyish...whatever that means! thanks for visiting my blog == I enjoyed your comments and was so happy to finally find someone had visited it!! Yes -- I Bahhhhed my way through the holiday and rather enjoyed it that way!!

    By Blogger Annie, at 12:02 AM  

  • Ooh, lots of comments here. I have two girls who are both different as shoes and bananas. One is rather girly and fastidious, runs through the room with her ears plugged when CSI is on, but loves roller coasters and slapstick comedy.

    The other is messy as hell, likes sharks and snakes, loves to watch CSI (and jaws and jurassic park), shot a black powder rifle with us a couple weeks ago, and is scared of bugs and roller coasters and things.

    Oddly enough, I peg the girly one to be the granola vegan lesbian. (oh god, don't tell anyone I said that)

    Although the latter girl has spent the last three days wearing skirts and finally asked me if I would buy her a girl pair of shoes (she picked out silver black and orange boy shoes). She's not the type of kid to talk about her feelings, but I do want to find out why the sudden change of heart. I'm guessing she's getting some kind of peer pressure at school (even indirectly).

    I dressed both the girls in pink from time to time. Green and yellow and blue, too. They turned out to have their own preferences in spite of it all.

    I do agree that the gender programming sucks, but we all grow out of it or into it eventually I think.

    My Punk Baby is conceived of and owned by one of Brian's best friend's/business partner's soon-to-be-ex wives. Ooh, that's a mouthful. It's just weird to see her stuff referenced anywhere but on her own website.

    (the sister in-law)

    PS - Nat just told me you had a blog. This is the first entry I read. I will go and read the rest now. :)

    PPS - did the pumpkin seeds turn out good? We burnt ours, but they tasted yummy.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:38 PM  

  • I knew that was Toria's post immediately. I was about to post the same information about her girls.

    I'm not exactly girlie either. I tried to be a few times. Like get a good job that requires dresses (I'm from the olden days remember) and neat hair. No matter how I tried, after 5 minutes my hair would be fraggled out, my makeup worn off, and the heels kicked off under the desk.

    Thinking over the past 30 years, it may be a good idea to "Pink up" the baby girls. That would give them something safe to rebel against when they're teens.

    Regardless of the efforts of misguided parents, every child is born with their own temperment and personality, and as they grow up, their true "colors" will come through just fine. All parents can do is guide and be a safe place to fall. The rest is up to them.

    And if they made a toy tool bench for little girls, it'd probably be pink with sparkly things on it. And would sell like crazy.

    By Blogger Rick's Mom, at 9:33 AM  

  • I had to remove this post for a while while I figured out how to remove an inappropriate comment. I've done that and now it's back. Thanks to everyone who commented.

    I like Monica's idea of pinking up little girls in order to give them something to rebel against. I'm not sure it would work, but it's funny!

    By Blogger Abyss of Silence, at 12:06 PM  

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